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Lennon and McCartney said it.  Rumi, Kabir, Hafiz (and other Sufis) wrote about it. Religion and culture chime in loudly about the importance of it. The  total mass of songs, poems and movies that implore us to find it, keep it and renew it could create another planet. The lectures, articles and books on love and compassion for the human race, a specific “other”  and the self fill the airwaves, bookshelves and ezines of our lives. So what is the fuss all about? Is it about romance or sex, connection or intimacy?

Ask yourself, “What if love were the single greatest tool for personal development”?  How might that change the way you view your intimate relationship?  If we look at the relationship we have with the beloved,  can we connect with the Beloved? Beyond the romantic elements, the physical delights,  the pain and misunderstanding, the frustration and the joy, lurks a path to awakening that accelerates the process of maturation a thousand fold.

“Shelf-help” as Wendy Palmer likes to call it, can advise us about meeting, wooing and  bedding perhaps wedding  the attractive candidate. Only being in a relationship that names “coming home to oneself” as the greatest goal, brings us Love, with the capital L.

Stephen and Ondrea Levine say “Few recognize the enormous power of a relationship as a vehicle for physical. spiritual, and emotional healing.”  Why is this true?

We are enculturated into a view of  intimate relationship as romantic.  And the definition for romantic is fairly narrow at that. Rarely do we encounter role models for partnering as a path to awakening to our true nature.

Relationships are the stage upon which we play out our very young understanding of love in its many guises. What we  were told (and taught) about love by our caretakers  when we were little shows up in our adult relationships. What we experienced in our very impressionable early years of development, before we could speak,  also shows up. How our parents treated one another is often a more indelible experience than their words about “being loving.” The same is true for  the injunctions of priests, rabbis, teachers, scout leaders, etc. How lovingly we were treated effects us long past the exit of many players from the stage of our lives.  What we needed and desired as vulnerable children (and didn’t get) we attempt to redress through our partners. This puts enormous pressure on our lovers – impossible pressure, as they too seek solace for  early unmet  needs.

In psychology, we learn of “object relations”  which deeply affect our loving connections.  These ways to relating to others basically casts them in a role of an important early caretaker unconsciously – so we don’t see the person – we are “back with” the important mother or father or granny. When we unconsciously stop seeing our beloved by replacing him or her with a parent  (with whom we  all have unresolved issues) we attempt to heal the past. By its very nature, the past cannot be undone, but we try again and again to have a “do over” which never works.  What works instead?

Recognizing that a relationship is the perfect place to practice transparency, commitment (especially when times are challenging),  generosity,  healthy boundaries (caring for the other without merging) deep listening, compassion are steps along the path. The method is being Present, both to arises within and to the real other before you,

And when things go awry,  and they always do, looking at the situation from an undefended position, begs us hold the question of “where am I in this?”  What is my contribution? Seeking out the truth of old pain and unresolved suffering  that arises and allowing our partner to be in it with us, rather than suppressing or denying  it allows us to begin the healing. When we can enter into our partners pain without trying to make it go away, hold space for her suffering and be a witness, we continue the healing process. These acts of loving  often are called forth when we are triggered into the old feelings…  yet being with the experience, sharing our feelings of shame, guild, abandonment, loss or grief  creates the intimacy that ultimately heals, that accelerates our maturation.

Rather than leaning on the beloved to hold us up, we become two upright entities that evolve beside one another without creating a hindering shadow. So yes, all you need is love, real love which transcends romance.

Language Reveals Our Reality: Food for Thought

The other day, two friends were discussing current projects at work. I listened to their conversation with curiosity. Joe described his project as “a battle” while Karen used “a journey” to describe her experience. He laughingly pointed to the difference in their metaphors and I was struck by how the difference affected their approach to very similar situations.

“Listen deeply,” we are often told by communication experts. Though we nod sagely in response, what exactly are we agreeing to do? I suggest a critical first step is to attend to the metaphors those we are listening to utilize which frame their unique perspective on reality.

We learned in literature class that metaphors and similes add interest to our writing and speech. And while that is true, in this article we will concentrate on metaphors as more than a linguistic device. Let’s look instead at metaphor as a means to interpret the speaker (or writer’s) world.

Metaphor is used here as any circumstance when a person uses one conceptual category, circumstance or thing to define or describe another; essentially to understand and experience one thing in terms of something else.

Linguist George Lakoff and philosopher Mark Johnson provide convincing evidence that metaphors may actually be people’s primary mode of mental operation. They argue that because the mind is “embodied” – that is, it experiences the world through the body in which it resides – people cannot help but conceptualize the world in terms of bodily perceptions. Our concepts of up-down, in-out, front-back, light-dark, warm-cold are all related to orientations and perceptions acquired through bodily senses.

“She is a top performer” indicates a vertical orientation while he is falling behind” indicates a horizontal one. In the book, Metaphors We Live By, Lakoff and Johnson suggest that the metaphors through which people conceptualize abstract concepts influence the way in which they understand them. Furthermore, this understanding frames their actions which reinforces the metaphors, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Consider some familiar expressions people use when describing ideas as food, plants, and commodities. (Italics for metaphors are used throughout this article to make them stand out.)

Ideas Are Food

What he said left a bad taste in my mouth. These are nothing but half-baked ideas, and warmed over theories.  I can’t digest all these new ideas. Can you swallow that claim?

Doesn’t that argument smell fishy? Now here’s an idea you can really sink your teeth into. She devours information.  This is the meaty part of the paper.

Ideas Are Plants

She has a fertile imagination. Her ideas have come to fruition. That idea died on the vine. That’s a budding theory. The seeds of his great ideas were planted in his youth. He has a barren mind.

Ideas Are Commodities

There is always a market for good ideas. Great ideas are currency in the intellectual marketplace. It is important how you package your ideas.  She has been a source of valuable ideas.

What can we discern about the speakers of these sentences? It is no surprise that humans attempt to understand vague, abstract or complex concepts in terms of more familiar experiences. The point is that the metaphor a person selects to frame a concept/experience necessarily focuses attention on some aspects while ignoring others.

If ideas are commodities, then they must be marketable. Focusing attention on this metaphor emphasizes how these ideas will be received (bought) by other people and whether they are saleable. This is very different from an orientation that holds ideas are plants. If ideas are plants, instead of rushing to get them out the door and to crank out as many as possible, ideas can be allowed to ripen and mature, to come to fruition. For the speaker who holds ideas are food, they are to be digested. Many ideas can then be tasted and tried. Ideas are to be consumed by that speaker.

In listening deeply we are able to note how the speaker who orients to holding ideas as commodities places value externally. A belief is expressed that value is in the eyes of the beholder (or buyer). Once we recognize this belief, we can check out whether this is true in other parts of life for this person. If his orientation is external, he places importance on how he is perceived. What behaviors would follow from this orientation? How would he assess others? Where would he find meaning? What role would self-image play in his life?

Returning to the conversation with my friends, I note that Joe, who holds his experience as a battle, may see his role as a general and his direct reports as his battalion. He is more likely to see his organization as a hierarchy than an opportunity for collaboration and to interpret requests of him as orders and to issue commands that are non-negotiable. What becomes important when listening deeply to Joe is checking whether this orientation holds for the rest of his life. If so, what is the cost to him to hold life this way? What is missing for him?

Karen, holding her project as a journey, comes to it with many questions, approaches her direct reports as fellow travelers and mapmakers. Together they are attempting to find the best route, knowing that there may be delays and that they may be sidetracked but that the pit stops may be as important/useful as the final destination. What can we learn about Karen’s behavior in the rest of her life? What challenges might she face when called upon to make executive decisions? Is she able to give compelling directions? What is the cost to her to hold life with this perspective?

Since metaphors are particularly useful, as they define roles, how the speaker sees himself and others, becomes clear to the listener. From here, an understanding of the speaker’s experience of the world emerges. Often, metaphors become an excellent predictor of the behavior the speaker will naturally assume. Knowing this, the deep listener can anticipate breakdowns.

When I worked with teachers, I heard many metaphors that disclosed the teacher’s orientation to his students. My classroom is a zoo, or my kids are really blossoming told me a great deal about how that teacher perceived of himself, his role, his students and education.

If a speaker sees himself as a gardener, his direct reports are plants to be cultivated. If he is a shepherd, they are sheep, unable to think for themselves. Furthermore, do these speakers think of their family members, friends and associates this way? What behavior would be predicated by these ways of orienting to others? To themselves?

We can begin to develop the competence of listening deeply by taking note of the metaphors we hear. We start with ourselves. Becoming aware of the metaphors we use, holding questions about the natural behavior that follows from this perspective and orientation, checking it out and anticipating breakdowns make the command, “listen deeply” indeed a powerful one – for ourselves and those with whom we wish to connect. And while listening deeply is a complex competence. Beginning to pay close attention to metaphors is a powerful way to begin.

Communication 101 for Leaders

Whether we’re dealing with under-performing employees, challenging direct reports, negotiating with difficult clients or discussing breakdowns on projects, difficult conversations arise. Few leaders understand the dynamics of difficult conversations. Most avoid them.

Great leaders skillfully decipher the structure of difficult conversations, interpret the significance of what was said, identify their own unspoken assumptions and manage strong emotions. They then try to discover the assumptions of the other person and navigate to resolutions that empower all parties.

Delivering a difficult message, no matter how much tact the speaker brings, is going to sting, maybe do real damage. There is a much better way however, than avoiding the issue or burying it in a larger issue or letting it “leak out” sideways.   Even when the difficulty is palpable, the conversation can be less stressful and more productive when some critical steps are taken.

What does it take to become masterful where it counts? First, separate impact from intention. If you focus only on impact, you will be unable to listen deeply to the other person who is acting from his specific intentions. The inability to separate keeps you in “blame” mode – unproductive at best and destructive to the relationship at worst.

Hold your view  of what is happening as a hypothesis. Remember, in science class you learned that a hypothesis is just as useful when it is proven wrong. Stay open to another interpretation of “the facts.” (And don’t pretend you don’t have a hypothesis.)

Listen past the accusations for the underlying feelings – yours and his. These need to be addressed as much as “the facts” if you hope to arrive at a resolution that dignifies all. Try assuming the other person’s role. How does it look from there? Regardless of the organizational culture, feelings cannot be dispensed with. Trying to eliminate feelings leads to broken agreements and destructive work place environments.

Use the language of feelings when talking about them. Say “I feel….” and beware the word “that” creeping into your expression. When you say, “I feel that…” you have left the arena of feelings and moved, almost imperceptibly, to judgment.  Stay aware! Feeling language includes such adjectives as disappointed, frustrated, overwhelmed, angry, depressed, exhilarated, enthusiastic, etc.  A great resource for the language of feelings and needs can be found on the Center for Non-Violent Communication web site. Giving voice to your feelings  models for the other party that emotion is  a legitimate part of your  conversation

Turn “my story” vs. “your story” into “our story” and give up blaming. Clearly each person in the situation has a point of view of what happened  that they will put forth. When these are woven together into a wider, third perspective, more of the “truth” of what happened is available.

We are complicated and so are our intentions. Move from judgment to investigating all the contributing factors  to the current situation – like avoiding, being unapproachable and role assumptions. This is a movement away from looking backward to instead,  looking ahead.

Expect imperfection. Allow yourself and the other person to be human, therefore to make mistakes. Failure is  only feedback!  If what is driving you is a an intention to have a productive, meaningful conversation that leads to either a solution to a current problem or a better relationship if future, the effort will be rewarded with improved communication skills.

And if there is more to resolve than one conversation can contain, agree to come back. Sometimes 2 or 3 passes are required to unknot a complex situation. Reflection time  between conversations can only be helpful, never harmful.

Finally, acknowledge yourself and the other  person for  your willingness to take part in a difficult conversation.

Tracking Intimacy: Getting Close to Your Partner

Do your relationships feel stale? Are you wondering where intimacy is hibernating? Are you experiencing the “blahs” when you long to feel engaged, engrossed and connected? The sparkle may have fizzled or been stillborn. Now, your feelings of closeness may be hitchhiking towards the hills.

Unlike most skills, we are rarely taught how to communicate on a deep level. And in our busy lives, we often share the details of our days rather than the contents of our hearts. Intimacy is a habit that needs fostering like a good tennis serve or cleaning the trunk of the car. And the results are far more beneficial.

Start small. And start with yourself. (Its so easy to expect “the other” to be responsible for communication and connection.) Avoid setting up a “serious conversation”. Its almost guaranteed to build stress and cause avoidance. Be more forthcoming about your own feelings. Use phrases like “I wonder if…” or “Sometimes, I doubt whether I…” or “I’ve noticed I’m happiest when…”

State your feelings rather than your opinions on topics that are important. If what you’re saying includes the word “that,” hold back! Warning: most sentences of feeling that contain the word “that” – aren’t! They’re judgments! Use your smarts here. Think about it. Saying something like “I feel that she [or you)…” is not stating a feeling – its an opinion. That’s very different. Feelings words are words like: ashamed, embarrassed, sad, apprehensive, frightened, delighted, excited, nervous, serene, etc. Intimacy is built on feelings, not critiques. Watch how you express yours.

Ask questions about feelings too. “How do you feel about that?” is not the same as “What do you think about that?” Most of us express our thoughts far more readily and often than our feelings. Yet sharing what we feel is what connects us to another. When you’ve asked the question and your partner responds with, “I think…” listen carefully and try to focus on the feeling behind the thoughts. A gentle, “Umm, I get your thinking and am wondering how you  are feeling.” This takes practice – for both of you.

Remember, a deep breath is a good tool  to use before plunging in.  Also, it’s not helpful to criticize by pointing out what’s lacking when your partner shares. Taking in the words and the emotions you sense in much more helpful. And then, noticing what this evokes in you – your emotions and what arises in your body. Sharing that helps bring the conversations into the “Now” and away from history or projection of the future.  By far,  more useful are questions that bring  you both  to where you’ll be sharing on a more meaningful level what is true in this moment.

Practice courage. When you find yourself avoiding a topic, analyze why it’s hard to bring up. Ask yourself, “What concern, need, fear or desire is attached to this topic. What am I trying to avoid?” You may need to ask this question many times before the answers reaches you through whatever filters you’ve  creatde to bypass a difficult issue You may want to jot down the answers. The first ones may just begin to lead you down the trail to what is really at stake for you. Look closely at the thoughts that arise. When you can answer those question honestly you’re ready to bravely move forward. Know that successfully tackling these “hot buttons” builds confidence.

If the commitment to the relationship is bigger than the fear of the response you may  receive, the courage to tackle the difficult topics will appear! Make that a question you frequently ask yourself when you find yourself “just letting it go.’ Letting “it” go rarely is. Most often it is shutting a part of yourself down.

There’s a sad truth about hot buttons. Usually the topics we avoid are those that need airing most. When you’re clear on what makes a particular issue a “hot button” topic, take a deep breath. Develop an “I” statement to open the dialogue. “I” statements avoid blame. They are statements over which we take responsibility rather than point a finger. “I feel frightened when weeks go by without cuddling,” or “I felt secure when you told your parents we couldn’t visit until my big project was over,” are examples of “I” statements. They open a meaningful conversation and invite sharing.

Be realistic. You can only work on your end of the relationship. And that takes practice, a sense of humor and courage. Like any skill executed with style and confidence, practice and realistic expectations are the main ingredients. And when you fumble, laugh at yourself. Failure is only feedback on how to succeed next time.

When working on creating connection, remember to start small, start with yourself, be ready to laugh at yourself. Develop courage, be realistic and be patient. And try and try again. The result is strong cement that binds you with the human race, one person at a time.

Passion is Power: Finding Yours

“Are you breathing just a little and calling it a life?” asks Mary Oliver in a famous poem.  What is your answer?

And on a spectrum between  faint interest and rabid obsession  when are you in the red zone?  These days, when do you light up? Sometimes the details of humdrum making a living are so entangling that even the idea of passion loses it juice. Gregg Levoy, in Callings, says that “passion is accompanied by the sound of primal yahoos, castanets in the heart, the beating of wings.” When  and where do you experience this upsurge?

Passion is what we would do if we weren’t worried about consequences or the neighbor’s opinions or our self-image or just stuck in  outdated routines.. It is the path we would follow if we dared rip away the “shoulds” of our lives and seek beneath them for meaning and connection. The form passion takes is less important than the movement to staple it to our living. Regardless of whether we take up  the tenor sax, or  trek in Nepal, began writing children’s books or open a knitted shawl business, something profound shifts. Sometimes adversity points out strengths we didn’t know we possessed, or   a collaboration leads us in a new direction. We  may educate ourselves into a calling or simply add a magical  ingredient to our life without a total overhaul.  Regardless, we must find the courage to seek our aliveness. The movement towards our passion is  more critical  than the shape it takes.

Often we freeze because we believe  that living into passion means reconstructing our lives from the ground up – a daunting enterprise.  Sometimes inertia imprisons us. If we re-frame our fears, we find moving into passion more like a breathing into a conspiracy of Life coming to meet us, if we dare whisper what  ignites our creative force.

Reflection: In a journal over the next two weeks, record those events of each day where you came present. What sensations signaled that shift? What thoughts arose? After the two weeks, review for any emerging patterns. Then ask yourself: How can I bring more of this into my life?  What next steps am I willing to commit to and for what length of time? Who can support me in this?

Passion connects us to our humanity – our dynamic, creative potential. Through a passionate engagement  we respond to life  deeply, fully. Breath deeply, come  present and dance into your fullness. Like the knock of Love at the door, when passion rings the bell, there is only one response: Follow!


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Dancing in the Dark: Part Two

“Before you can see the light, you have to deal with the darkness.”

– Dan Millman

Experience is precious. Let’s investigate it!  We explored curiosity in Part One.  Why is it so important in shadow work? Curiosity occurs in freedom… freedom meaning here a space uncluttered by assumptions, judgments, suppositions and filled with a dynamic desire to learn, to know.   When we are truly curious, rather than compelled by some formulaic methodology, we allow our intuition into the room.  And, when we aren’t curious, a compelling question to ask  ourselves is, “What  shadow element am I supporting by keeping this door shut?” What we avoid being curious about is a powerful clue to some element of our shadow.

In our families, we learned that being curious about certain subjects was taboo. Yet certain topics brought not only recognition but rewards. The messages about the subjects to avoid were often further complicated by indirect signals (like facial expressions, shallow breathing or changing the topic). Bypassing our own verbal markers, we “metabolized” these messages without actually deconstructing them. They became shadowy, but strongly informed future patterns in us.

Some families disallowed the sad emotions – grief, despair, disappointment, for example,  weren’t accepted. In others, topics like money, mental health or sex were taboo.

Here’s a useful exploration.Where we were free to be curious, around what topics and where we we restricted? What arises ( sensations, emotions and ideas) when we touch into those unacceptable subjects, the ones that we were discouraged from pursuing. Observing ourselves as we explore our curiosity helps identify areas where we have dark shadows.

The next step, after identifying these areas is to see what strategies you employ in keeping parts of yourself hidden. Try this self-observation ( SO).

As you do this SO, try to get closer and closer to the experience of each moment of Presence and note more and more exactly what the experience is like emotionally and somatically (contractions, heat, numbness, energy, breathing, pulsing, heaviness, lightness – whatever).

Then, each day for ONE WEEK ONLY, YET IN DETAIL, take a few moments to note how these showed up in you: Be specific. Be rigorous.

Fear: (projection about the future)

Attachment: (inability to let go of a thought, idea, thing that doesn’t serve you)

Control: (choice that keeps you in the manager’s seat)

Entitlement: (a sense that something – space, action, response is owed you)

Manipulation: (indirect behavior involving an other to get something you want)

Anxiety: (projection onto the present based on the past)

What am I discovering about myself? What patterns emerge? What new questions do I have?


As the pattern surfaces, name it  gently and welcome it. Then exaggerate the emotional and physical sensations that arise with the thoughts (like turning up the brightness knob on the TV). Stay with the discomfort.  Check it out fully – what texture does it take, what color, what scent, what size, what taste. Staying with the experience offers up fresh insights… what the intelligence of this experience ( protection, avoidance, distraction for example). Once this pattern served a younger, less resourceful me. Does it serve me now? If not, I invite it to loosen (and eventually to leave) its grip.

By shining the light of awareness on our pattern,  we use less energy to keep the pattern in place and the place dark. We free some of our energy for other parts of living for our creativity and we take back our power.

Narratives – A Practice

Here’s something I’ve noticed. Its often challenging for coaches to be  both succinct and to “go deep” in establishing a client’s current narrative. And if the proffered current narrative doesn’t go deep enough, the new one loses impact,  is too narrow or shallow; doesn’t enroll the client.

I’ve found a lovely practice for developing this competence. And its fun (for those film buffs among us).

When we watch films that are largely character studies (and well written, well acted) we can eliminate the superfluous by asking (for each main character) the three magic questions:

Who am I?
Who are others?
What am I to do?

From there, we can imagine the new narrative and its possibilities -one offering a wider view, a fresh perspective. In fact, much good filmmaking does just that – explores a possible narrative the character is moving into…

Here are two releases that are particularly appropriate for this:
“The Cake Eaters” by Mary Stuart Masterson (2009) and “The Lucky Ones” by Neil Burger (2008)

Both films are unusual, moving and feature strong character studies that are extremely well acted.  If film is not your preference, you can practice while reading biographies and good fiction.

Enjoy, practice and develop your competence in offering powerful narratives to your clients.

What are You Coaching: Trait or State?

Fundamental Attribution Error – what is it and why is it important? Despite the stuffy name, this is an extremely important concept for coaches to keep front and center as they work with clients. Dr. William Berquist, author of Developing Human and Organizational Resources explains it this way:

“There are two ways behavior emerges in an individual, Trait and State.

“Trait is what neuroscientists would call the functions of the deep ganglia – habit or neural pathways so frequently used that one reverts to these without using much energy – an automatic pilot of sorts. Trait doesn’t change without ongoing, persistent effort – effective coaching.

“State, on the other hand, is induced by the wealth of input in the environment, what David Rock, author of Quiet Leadership refers to as olfactory, gustatory, kinesthetic, visual, auditory, self digital (self-talk) and is strongly affected by perceptions of fear vs. security, high status vs. low status. State fluctuates with every situation.”

Often when we analyze what is going on with us, we come up with the unusual formula, “I act from State, You act from Trait”. We assume that “You” act from Trait so that you will be predictable and we can feel grounded in our assessment of how you will “show up” in future. Yet in looking inward, we acknowledge that our behavior is in sync with each situation as it arises.

This is a critical error when assessing others – particularly when coaching – Fundamental Attribution Error. We attribute Trait to the behavior of others, to feel safe and State to our own actions.

Often, in business, a client becomes “stuck” when thinking her first reports (or those she reports to) act from Trait, rather than State. With that thinking, attention is focused on seeing only behaviors that support that perspective. A built in sense of impotency arises as she focuses is on the “problem” rather than generating flexibility, possibility, and openness.

Likewise, beginning coaches rely heavily on assessments that see the client in terms of Trait rather than State.  A reliance on the Enneagram without sufficient training is Trait oriented.  Moving from this place limits the coach’s listening, hence design and leads to rigidity.

Wondering how to avoid this error in your work? Coach your client by helping her look at settings in which certain traits come up. Explore context.  Invest time in determining whether the coaching issue is State or Trait related. Discuss State and Trait with your client. Help the client observe both in her life.

Then develop inventories of how others see the client (descriptive assessment) to measure against.  Share these as part of the exploration. If the issue the client is working on is management (of a team, division, company) explore whether the client is assessing others according to their State or Trait.  Help her understand how to change the State to support the behaviors that will increase trust, communication, and productivity.

And check in with yourself when you notice yourself predicting the behavior of others. Are you making a fundamental attribution error?

Mastermind: Case Consultation and Business Development

There is synergy of energy, commitment, and excitement that participants bring to a Mastermind Group. The beauty of Mastermind Groups is that participants raise the bar by challenging each other to create and implement goals, brainstorm ideas, and support each other with courage, respect and compassion.  Mastermind participants act as catalysts for growth, devil’s advocates and supportive colleagues.

The concept of the Mastermind Group was formally introduced by Napoleon Hill in the early 1900’s. In his timeless classic, “Think And Grow Rich” he wrote about the Mastermind principle as:

“The coordination of knowledge and effort of two or more people, who work toward a definite purpose, in the spirit of harmony.”  He continues …
“No two minds ever come together without thereby creating a third, invisible intangible force, which may be likened to a third mind.”

In a Mastermind Group, the agenda belongs to the group, and each person’s participation is key. Your peers give you feedback, help you brainstorm new possibilities, and set up accountability structures that keep you focused and on track. You will create a community of supportive colleagues who will brainstorm together to move the group to new heights.

You’ll gain tremendous insights, which can improve your business (and personal) life. Your Mastermind Group is like having a objective board of directors.


• Experience, skill and confidence
• Step by step development in your business
• Support & a sense of shared endeavor
• Coaching

How It Works

Two – four participants come together in a 90 minute monthly phone call with me. After a
check-in, followed by some coaching, a topic is discussed. (The topic may be a business issue or a client case). Participants set the agenda. Time is divided between two participants for an in-depth treatment of the issue raised. If the group contains more than two participants, they rotate through the second hour of the call. Participants report learning as much from each other’s issues as their own. The call is supported with a follow-up summary and further resources